1 00:00:02,129 --> 00:00:04,249 (DOCTOR WHO THEME) 2 00:01:17,569 --> 00:01:19,169 (WHOOSHING) 3 00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:37,689 At last, Doctor. 4 00:01:42,529 --> 00:01:44,329 Am I late for something? 5 00:01:44,409 --> 00:01:46,809 I was beginning to fear you had lost yourself. 6 00:01:46,889 --> 00:01:48,489 Sit down. 7 00:02:00,049 --> 00:02:03,769 Well, even I would find it hard to lose myself in a corridor. 8 00:02:03,849 --> 00:02:06,409 Especially when propelled by the mental energy 9 00:02:06,489 --> 00:02:09,609 of so many distinguished Time Lords. 10 00:02:09,689 --> 00:02:12,089 Oh, I don't know. You seem to have a great talent 11 00:02:12,169 --> 00:02:15,009 for straying from the straight and narrow. 12 00:02:22,649 --> 00:02:25,009 Would it be too much to ask what all this is about? 13 00:02:25,089 --> 00:02:28,249 The accused will remain silent until invited to speak. 14 00:02:28,329 --> 00:02:30,729 The accused? Do you mean me? 15 00:02:32,049 --> 00:02:34,929 I call upon the Vale yard to open the case. 16 00:02:35,609 --> 00:02:37,409 By order of the High Council, 17 00:02:37,489 --> 00:02:41,049 this is an impartial inquiry into the behaviour of the accused person 18 00:02:41,129 --> 00:02:42,289 known as the Doctor. 19 00:02:42,369 --> 00:02:45,409 Who is charged that he, on diverse occasions, 20 00:02:45,489 --> 00:02:48,249 has been guilty of conduct unbecoming a Time Lord. 21 00:02:48,369 --> 00:02:50,769 - Not guilty! - He is also charged with, 22 00:02:50,849 --> 00:02:54,169 on diverse occasions, transgressing the First Law. 23 00:02:54,929 --> 00:02:57,689 It is my unpleasant task, Madam Inquisitor, 24 00:02:57,769 --> 00:03:01,569 to prove to the inquiry that the Doctor is an incorrigible meddler 25 00:03:01,649 --> 00:03:04,129 in the affairs of other peoples and planets. 26 00:03:04,209 --> 00:03:07,649 Yes. I see, Vale yard, that it is on record 27 00:03:07,729 --> 00:03:11,489 that the Doctor has faced trial already for of fences of this nature. 28 00:03:11,569 --> 00:03:13,169 That is so, my lady. 29 00:03:13,249 --> 00:03:15,089 And I shall contend that the High Council 30 00:03:15,169 --> 00:03:17,969 showed too great a leniency on that occasion. 31 00:03:18,049 --> 00:03:19,449 Very well. 32 00:03:19,529 --> 00:03:21,889 Doctor, you've heard the charges. 33 00:03:22,689 --> 00:03:26,209 Do you wish to say anything before the inquiry proceeds? 34 00:03:27,009 --> 00:03:29,569 Only that this whole thing is a farce. 35 00:03:29,649 --> 00:03:32,769 I am Lord President of Gallifrey. 36 00:03:32,849 --> 00:03:35,129 You can't put me on trial. 37 00:03:35,209 --> 00:03:38,169 Doctor, since you wilfully neglected 38 00:03:38,249 --> 00:03:41,889 the responsibility of your great office, you were deposed. 39 00:03:43,729 --> 00:03:45,209 Oh. 40 00:03:45,289 --> 00:03:47,609 - Is that legal? - Perfectly. 41 00:03:47,689 --> 00:03:51,569 But we won't hold it against you. Quite the contrary, in fact. 42 00:03:51,649 --> 00:03:54,689 And to see that your interests are fully protected, 43 00:03:54,769 --> 00:03:58,489 I propose to appoint a court defender to represent you. 44 00:03:58,569 --> 00:04:03,009 Oh... Thank you, but no, thank you. 45 00:04:03,089 --> 00:04:05,329 I have been through several such inquiries before. 46 00:04:05,409 --> 00:04:09,169 I think it would be easier if I speak for myself. 47 00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:13,409 The court notes the Doctor refuses the services of a court defender. 48 00:04:14,569 --> 00:04:15,889 Proceed, Vale yard. 49 00:04:15,969 --> 00:04:18,649 Inquisitor, I am not proposing to waste the time of the court 50 00:04:18,729 --> 00:04:21,249 by dwelling in detail on the activities of the accused. 51 00:04:21,329 --> 00:04:24,129 - Good. - Instead, I intend to adumbrate 52 00:04:24,209 --> 00:04:28,769 two typical instances from separate epistopic interfaces of the spectrum. 53 00:04:29,649 --> 00:04:32,649 These examples of the criminal behaviour of the accused 54 00:04:32,729 --> 00:04:35,409 are fully recorded in the Matrix, 55 00:04:35,489 --> 00:04:37,769 the repository of all knowledge. 56 00:04:37,849 --> 00:04:42,489 I should like to begin with the Doctor's involvement in the affairs of Ravolox, 57 00:04:42,569 --> 00:04:45,089 a planet within the Stellian galaxy. 58 00:04:49,129 --> 00:04:51,529 I don't think I like Ravolox very much. 59 00:04:51,609 --> 00:04:53,689 It reminds me of a wet November back on Earth. 60 00:04:53,769 --> 00:04:55,569 Now that's part of the reason why we're here. 61 00:04:55,649 --> 00:04:56,729 Huh? 62 00:04:56,809 --> 00:04:59,169 Well, Ravolox has the same mass, angle of tilt, 63 00:04:59,249 --> 00:05:02,129 - and period of rotation as Earth. - So? 64 00:05:02,209 --> 00:05:04,569 Well, I thought that was quite interesting. 65 00:05:04,649 --> 00:05:07,649 It's unusual to find two planets so similar. 66 00:05:07,729 --> 00:05:09,569 In fact, it's quite a phenomenon. 67 00:05:09,649 --> 00:05:11,769 Oh, pity it couldn't be a dry one. 68 00:05:11,849 --> 00:05:13,929 Ravolox also has the distinction 69 00:05:14,009 --> 00:05:17,009 of having been destroyed by a solar fireball. 70 00:05:17,569 --> 00:05:19,209 It doesn't look very destroyed. 71 00:05:19,289 --> 00:05:21,329 DOCTOR: According to the records on Gallifrey, 72 00:05:21,409 --> 00:05:25,249 it was devastated by a solar fireball some five centuries ago. 73 00:05:26,649 --> 00:05:29,449 I think somebody exaggerated, don't you? 74 00:05:29,529 --> 00:05:30,929 - Hmm. - Hmm. 75 00:05:35,489 --> 00:05:37,009 DOCTOR: Hmm. 76 00:05:37,729 --> 00:05:38,849 (EXHALES) 77 00:05:38,929 --> 00:05:42,689 The exhilarating smell of a freshly laundered forest. 78 00:05:42,769 --> 00:05:44,009 Can't beat it. 79 00:05:44,089 --> 00:05:48,089 And the twittering of tiny birds and the rustle of small mammals 80 00:05:48,169 --> 00:05:50,249 as they forage for food in the undergrowth. 81 00:05:50,329 --> 00:05:51,569 Exactly. 82 00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:56,609 Then you've better hearing than me. There aren't any birds. 83 00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:57,849 Listen. 84 00:05:57,929 --> 00:06:00,049 I wondered when you'd notice. 85 00:06:00,129 --> 00:06:02,089 None of this makes any sense. 86 00:06:02,169 --> 00:06:06,209 Any soil left after the visitation of a fireball would be sterile. 87 00:06:06,289 --> 00:06:08,089 Well done! 88 00:06:08,169 --> 00:06:10,289 Don't patronise me, Doctor. 89 00:06:10,369 --> 00:06:13,169 You knew from the start this amount of growth wasn't possible. 90 00:06:13,249 --> 00:06:15,929 I also knew, that as a student of botany, 91 00:06:16,009 --> 00:06:19,449 you'd soon realise the truth without any prompting from me. 92 00:06:21,329 --> 00:06:22,969 - Maybe. - Hmm. 93 00:06:24,529 --> 00:06:27,049 Is there any intelligent life here? 94 00:06:27,729 --> 00:06:30,369 What, apart from me you mean? 95 00:06:30,449 --> 00:06:32,729 I don't know. Shall we find out? 96 00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:33,889 (DOCTOR CHUCKLES) 97 00:06:43,649 --> 00:06:45,809 Well, they're not from round here, Mr Glitz. 98 00:06:45,889 --> 00:06:48,249 I know that, Dibber. 99 00:06:49,329 --> 00:06:50,689 Aha! 100 00:06:53,329 --> 00:06:54,809 DOCTOR: Look at this. 101 00:06:58,889 --> 00:07:01,689 We are certainly not on this planet alone. 102 00:07:03,529 --> 00:07:05,329 DOCTOR: Mmm-hmm. 103 00:07:05,409 --> 00:07:08,569 Let's reconnoitre, shall we? 104 00:07:09,729 --> 00:07:12,569 You know, Dibber, I'm the product of a broken home. 105 00:07:12,649 --> 00:07:15,289 You have mentioned it on occasion, Mr Glitz. 106 00:07:15,369 --> 00:07:17,449 Which sort of unbalanced me. 107 00:07:17,529 --> 00:07:20,929 Made me selfish to the point where I cannot stand competition. 108 00:07:21,009 --> 00:07:23,209 Know the feeling only too well, Mr Glitz. 109 00:07:23,289 --> 00:07:27,089 Whereas yours is a simple case of sociopathy, Dibber, 110 00:07:27,169 --> 00:07:29,729 my malaise is much more complex. 111 00:07:29,809 --> 00:07:33,729 "A deep-rooted maladjustment," my psychiatrist said. 112 00:07:33,809 --> 00:07:38,009 "Brought on by an infantile inability to come to terms with the more" 113 00:07:38,089 --> 00:07:40,809 "pertinent, concrete aspects of life." 114 00:07:40,889 --> 00:07:44,289 That sounds more like an insult than a diagnosis, Mr Glitz. 115 00:07:44,369 --> 00:07:46,209 You're right there, my lad. 116 00:07:46,289 --> 00:07:48,489 Mind you, I had just attempted to kill him. 117 00:07:49,849 --> 00:07:52,889 Oh, I do hate prison psychiatrists, don't you? 118 00:07:53,249 --> 00:07:56,689 I mean, they do nothing for you. I must have seen dozens of them. 119 00:07:56,769 --> 00:07:59,009 And I still hate competition. 120 00:08:00,009 --> 00:08:02,729 Especially when it poaches my territory. 121 00:08:04,929 --> 00:08:06,889 GLITZ: I'm going to enjoy this. 122 00:08:08,809 --> 00:08:10,209 Too late! 123 00:08:10,289 --> 00:08:13,169 Oh, I do hate it when people get lucky. 124 00:08:13,249 --> 00:08:15,369 It really offends my sensibilities. 125 00:08:15,449 --> 00:08:17,329 Do you want me to go after them? 126 00:08:17,409 --> 00:08:20,009 How is it they know where to look? Tell me that, Dibber. 127 00:08:20,089 --> 00:08:22,769 I don't know. Maybe they bought a copy of the same map we did. 128 00:08:22,849 --> 00:08:26,089 - Do you want me to go after them? - Why? Do you want to help them? 129 00:08:26,169 --> 00:08:28,729 No, it's just that if they're after the same thing as us... 130 00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:31,569 Don't worry. They'll soon be dead. 131 00:08:32,369 --> 00:08:36,129 It's just that I wanted the personal pleasure of killing them myself. 132 00:08:39,969 --> 00:08:42,689 - Oh, here, Doctor, look. - Hmm? 133 00:08:45,449 --> 00:08:47,369 DOCTOR: The remains of a building. 134 00:08:47,449 --> 00:08:50,809 - We're not going inside. - Of course not, we can't. 135 00:08:50,889 --> 00:08:53,209 We haven't found the entrance yet. 136 00:08:53,289 --> 00:08:54,809 This is exactly the sort of place 137 00:08:54,889 --> 00:08:57,689 where some early life forms might have survived. 138 00:08:57,769 --> 00:08:59,129 Come along. 139 00:09:00,209 --> 00:09:03,169 Well, I'm just not crazy about meeting any early life forms. 140 00:09:03,249 --> 00:09:04,569 Hmm. Yeah. 141 00:09:05,289 --> 00:09:07,129 Well, if we've got competition, 142 00:09:07,209 --> 00:09:09,465 going to the village could prove a valuable waste of time. 143 00:09:09,489 --> 00:09:11,689 That complex down there is still functional, 144 00:09:11,769 --> 00:09:14,009 which means the L3 robot is operational. 145 00:09:14,089 --> 00:09:15,249 I understand. 146 00:09:15,329 --> 00:09:18,289 To render the robot non-operational, 147 00:09:18,369 --> 00:09:22,009 we have to destroy the light converter which supplies its energy system. 148 00:09:22,089 --> 00:09:25,089 - I know all that. - Then why are you arguing with me? 149 00:09:25,169 --> 00:09:28,009 It's not my fault if a bunch of backward savages 150 00:09:28,089 --> 00:09:31,609 have turned a Magnum Mark VII light converter into a totem pole. 151 00:09:31,689 --> 00:09:33,705 It's just that I think we should kill those two first. 152 00:09:33,729 --> 00:09:36,489 And meet the robot head on at full power? 153 00:09:37,169 --> 00:09:39,889 I don't think you have my full interests at heart, Dibber. 154 00:09:39,969 --> 00:09:42,929 If the robot doesn't kill them before we destroy his energy supply, 155 00:09:43,009 --> 00:09:44,769 they could be up and away with the goods 156 00:09:44,849 --> 00:09:46,305 before we've even got back from the village. 157 00:09:46,329 --> 00:09:47,849 I know that, Dibber. 158 00:09:47,929 --> 00:09:51,169 Now you understand why I hate competition. 159 00:09:51,249 --> 00:09:53,409 It spoils everything. 160 00:09:53,489 --> 00:09:55,649 I still think we should kill them. 161 00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:59,809 We will, Dibber. We will. When the time is right. 162 00:10:01,649 --> 00:10:04,529 Doctor, I know it sounds crazy, 163 00:10:04,609 --> 00:10:07,289 but I have the weirdest feeling that I've been here before. 164 00:10:07,369 --> 00:10:10,049 Yes, I often get that feeling. 165 00:10:10,129 --> 00:10:13,529 Of course, I usually have. In your case, it's not possible. 166 00:10:13,609 --> 00:10:15,889 Possible or not, I want to get away from here. 167 00:10:15,969 --> 00:10:18,249 You're absolutely right. 168 00:10:18,329 --> 00:10:20,969 We must find out what's going on here. 169 00:10:22,129 --> 00:10:24,889 Aha! That's it. 170 00:10:24,969 --> 00:10:26,369 Come along. 171 00:10:29,769 --> 00:10:30,889 Peri? 172 00:10:49,529 --> 00:10:52,289 - I've scratched myself. - Mmm? 173 00:10:53,449 --> 00:10:56,649 Oh, you're young. You'll soon heal. 174 00:10:56,729 --> 00:10:58,689 Thanks for the sympathy. 175 00:11:01,569 --> 00:11:03,849 You know, I'm glad I decided to come here. 176 00:11:03,929 --> 00:11:07,009 I might stay here for a year or so and write a thesis. 177 00:11:07,089 --> 00:11:09,769 Ancient Life on Ravolox by Doctor... 178 00:11:09,849 --> 00:11:11,489 PERI: Doctor, look! 179 00:11:11,569 --> 00:11:14,609 There's something here I think you should see. 180 00:11:19,249 --> 00:11:21,049 Look at them. Primitive screeds. 181 00:11:21,129 --> 00:11:22,649 - Are they from the village? - Must be. 182 00:11:22,729 --> 00:11:25,449 Well, then let's make it a few less we'll have to deal with. 183 00:11:25,529 --> 00:11:28,649 No! All we need is a gesture of strength. 184 00:11:29,569 --> 00:11:31,729 Show them they haven't got a chance. 185 00:11:36,769 --> 00:11:38,609 (CHUCKLES) 186 00:11:38,689 --> 00:11:42,529 Amazing the effect a loud bang can have on the primitive mind. 187 00:11:48,529 --> 00:11:51,649 GLITZ: Come here, you ignorant, maggot-ridden peasant. 188 00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:56,689 Somehow I always feel foolish saying this. 189 00:11:59,449 --> 00:12:01,249 Take me to your leader. 190 00:12:02,929 --> 00:12:05,609 Well, I suppose there is a billion-to-one chance 191 00:12:05,689 --> 00:12:09,129 there was a place called Marble Arch on Ravolox. 192 00:12:10,089 --> 00:12:12,129 And they wrote in English? 193 00:12:12,209 --> 00:12:15,049 Well, that's another billion-to-one chance. 194 00:12:15,129 --> 00:12:17,649 It does begin to seem a little unlikely, doesn't it? 195 00:12:17,729 --> 00:12:21,889 Oh, Doctor, we're on Earth, aren't we? I said it felt like Earth. 196 00:12:22,489 --> 00:12:24,545 It's in the wrong part of space for it to be your planet. 197 00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:28,049 Besides, according to all the records, this is Ravolox. 198 00:12:28,609 --> 00:12:31,329 - Well then, how do you explain this? - Well... 199 00:12:33,049 --> 00:12:34,649 (DOCTOR SIGHS) 200 00:12:35,449 --> 00:12:37,609 I can't, not yet. 201 00:12:37,689 --> 00:12:40,569 Unless, of course, perhaps they collected railway stations. 202 00:12:40,649 --> 00:12:43,649 - That's ridiculous. - But not impossible, though. 203 00:12:43,729 --> 00:12:46,969 Not as impossible as the other explanation. 204 00:12:47,049 --> 00:12:48,369 What's that? 205 00:12:48,449 --> 00:12:51,569 Well, that somehow or other your planet and its entire constellation 206 00:12:51,649 --> 00:12:54,409 managed to shift itself a couple of light years across space, 207 00:12:54,489 --> 00:12:58,169 after which, for some reason it became known as Ravolox. 208 00:12:58,809 --> 00:13:00,329 Well, what time are we in? 209 00:13:00,409 --> 00:13:03,009 Oh, a long time after your period. 210 00:13:03,649 --> 00:13:06,329 Uh, two million years or more. 211 00:13:06,409 --> 00:13:08,809 So what happened to London? 212 00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:10,969 Wiped out. 213 00:13:11,049 --> 00:13:12,449 I mean, if this was London. 214 00:13:14,209 --> 00:13:17,689 Doctor, I know it is. I can feel it. 215 00:13:17,769 --> 00:13:19,209 Now, don't get emotional. 216 00:13:19,289 --> 00:13:22,089 Don't get emotional? 217 00:13:22,169 --> 00:13:26,209 This cinder we're standing on is all that's left of my world. 218 00:13:26,289 --> 00:13:27,849 Everything I knew. 219 00:13:28,449 --> 00:13:31,729 Why do I have to sit here watching Peri getting upset 220 00:13:31,809 --> 00:13:35,329 while two unsavoury adventurers bully a bunch of natives? 221 00:13:35,409 --> 00:13:38,449 The reason will be made clear shortly, Doctor. 222 00:13:39,009 --> 00:13:42,649 - As a matter of interest, where is Peri? - Where you left her. 223 00:13:44,049 --> 00:13:46,569 - Where's that? - You don't remember? 224 00:13:46,649 --> 00:13:49,369 Obviously a side effect of being taken out of time. 225 00:13:49,449 --> 00:13:51,849 The amnesia should soon pass. 226 00:13:51,929 --> 00:13:53,609 Shall we continue? 227 00:13:54,809 --> 00:13:57,849 Well, can't we just have the edited highlights? 228 00:14:03,649 --> 00:14:05,929 I know how you feel. 229 00:14:06,009 --> 00:14:08,729 - Do you? - Of course I do. 230 00:14:09,289 --> 00:14:11,329 You've been travelling with me long enough to know 231 00:14:11,409 --> 00:14:13,409 that none of this really matters. 232 00:14:13,489 --> 00:14:14,929 Not to you. 233 00:14:15,009 --> 00:14:16,529 Your world is safe. 234 00:14:16,609 --> 00:14:18,009 (SIGHS) 235 00:14:18,089 --> 00:14:20,849 This is still my world, whatever the period. 236 00:14:20,929 --> 00:14:22,489 And I care about it. 237 00:14:22,569 --> 00:14:26,649 And all you do is talk about it as though we were in a planetarium. 238 00:14:27,209 --> 00:14:31,249 I'm sorry. But look at it this way, planets come and go. 239 00:14:31,329 --> 00:14:33,449 Stars perish. 240 00:14:33,529 --> 00:14:36,929 Matter disperses, coalesces, reforms into 241 00:14:37,009 --> 00:14:40,169 other patterns, other worlds. 242 00:14:42,009 --> 00:14:43,929 Nothing can be eternal. 243 00:14:45,409 --> 00:14:47,649 I know what you mean, 244 00:14:47,729 --> 00:14:50,329 but I still wanna get away from here. 245 00:14:51,049 --> 00:14:54,289 Oh, I can't. There's a mystery here. 246 00:14:54,369 --> 00:14:57,809 Questions to which I must have an answer. 247 00:14:57,889 --> 00:14:59,769 Look, Peri. Come here. 248 00:15:05,049 --> 00:15:09,129 Oh, hermetically sealed. Leading down to a lower level. 249 00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:13,849 Now, some of the original inhabitants might have survived down there. 250 00:15:13,929 --> 00:15:16,929 - You coming? - No. 251 00:15:17,009 --> 00:15:20,329 I've seen enough. I'll wait for you at the entrance. 252 00:15:21,569 --> 00:15:24,849 Where they used to sell candy bars and newspapers. 253 00:15:26,009 --> 00:15:28,129 All right, shan't be long. 254 00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:32,009 Don't go wandering off. Be careful. 255 00:15:35,929 --> 00:15:37,009 Oh! 256 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:42,369 I said be careful. 257 00:15:43,089 --> 00:15:44,369 Of what? 258 00:15:45,529 --> 00:15:49,209 The spooks and ghosts you're always telling me don't exist? 259 00:15:49,769 --> 00:15:52,809 Hey! You could have left me the umbrella! 260 00:15:55,169 --> 00:15:56,929 Oh, please yourself. 261 00:15:57,649 --> 00:15:59,809 I don't mind getting wet. 262 00:15:59,889 --> 00:16:01,129 (SIGHS) 263 00:16:03,609 --> 00:16:04,809 (SCREAMING) 264 00:16:12,769 --> 00:16:14,289 The light converter. 265 00:16:14,369 --> 00:16:16,649 Let me blast it, Mr Glitz, then we get away from here. 266 00:16:16,729 --> 00:16:18,929 Oh, you'd look good with a back full of spears, Dibber. 267 00:16:19,009 --> 00:16:20,489 Use your head. 268 00:16:31,689 --> 00:16:34,929 Anyway, we've got company. 269 00:16:35,009 --> 00:16:38,249 Right royal company by the looks of things. 270 00:16:38,329 --> 00:16:39,889 DIBBER: You'll never charm her. 271 00:16:39,969 --> 00:16:43,889 I have an uncanny knack with ageing females, Dibber. 272 00:16:43,969 --> 00:16:47,049 One look into my eyes and they start to melt. 273 00:17:20,649 --> 00:17:24,009 ELECTRONIC VOICE: Water thief! Water thief! Protect your water! 274 00:17:24,089 --> 00:17:27,049 Perhaps you could direct me to the stationmaster's house? 275 00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:28,689 Now please, gentlemen! 276 00:17:30,329 --> 00:17:31,409 Yes, Immortal? 277 00:17:31,489 --> 00:17:35,449 Marb Station shows one work unit over strength. 278 00:17:35,529 --> 00:17:38,009 - Remove it! - Immediately, Immortal. 279 00:17:48,729 --> 00:17:51,849 Call the Watch, Marb is a work unit over. 280 00:17:51,929 --> 00:17:53,089 How? 281 00:17:53,169 --> 00:17:56,449 I don't know, but the Immortal is never wrong, Grell. 282 00:17:56,529 --> 00:17:58,489 I'll summon the Watch. 283 00:17:59,489 --> 00:18:02,609 So, you are outlanders. From where? 284 00:18:02,729 --> 00:18:06,049 - A far off star, Majesty. - You have a spaceship? 285 00:18:07,089 --> 00:18:09,049 You know of such things? 286 00:18:09,129 --> 00:18:11,529 It is recorded in our folk memory. 287 00:18:12,689 --> 00:18:16,689 Before the fire, our ancestors travelled among the stars. 288 00:18:17,169 --> 00:18:18,969 Is that a fact? 289 00:18:19,049 --> 00:18:23,289 It is also recorded that such travel angered the gods, 290 00:18:23,369 --> 00:18:25,049 who punished us 291 00:18:25,129 --> 00:18:28,569 by sending the great fire which destroyed our planet. 292 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:30,209 No, dear lady. 293 00:18:30,289 --> 00:18:33,249 It was much more secular than that. 294 00:18:33,329 --> 00:18:35,969 That attracted the fireball. 295 00:18:37,169 --> 00:18:40,089 That is our Great Totem 296 00:18:40,169 --> 00:18:41,769 to the Earth God Haldron. 297 00:18:41,849 --> 00:18:46,929 No, madam, that is a malfunctioning navigational beacon. 298 00:18:47,009 --> 00:18:50,689 It was that that attracted the fireball 500 years ago. 299 00:18:50,769 --> 00:18:54,689 And I'm here to tell you that it is still malfunctioning today. 300 00:18:55,129 --> 00:18:56,769 How do you know this? 301 00:18:56,849 --> 00:18:58,409 It is my job to know. 302 00:18:58,489 --> 00:19:02,929 And if you don't have it dismantled, the fireball will return. 303 00:19:05,129 --> 00:19:06,689 What is your name? 304 00:19:06,769 --> 00:19:08,689 Sabalom Glitz. 305 00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:11,889 I am an old woman, Sabalom Glitz. 306 00:19:13,209 --> 00:19:16,609 You are not the first to visit my village from another world. 307 00:19:16,689 --> 00:19:17,969 Is that a fact? 308 00:19:18,049 --> 00:19:19,729 On each and every occasion, 309 00:19:19,809 --> 00:19:23,089 they have all wanted to dismantle the Great Totem. 310 00:19:23,489 --> 00:19:25,249 In that case, you understand the urgency... 311 00:19:25,329 --> 00:19:29,729 And on each and every occasion, they have all had a different reason. 312 00:19:29,809 --> 00:19:32,449 Let me assure you my credentials are bona fide 313 00:19:32,529 --> 00:19:34,489 and completely in order. 314 00:19:34,889 --> 00:19:37,849 Ah, yes. The guns. 315 00:19:37,929 --> 00:19:40,049 They all had similar credentials. 316 00:19:40,129 --> 00:19:43,889 That totem is a navigational hazard. It must be dismantled. 317 00:19:43,969 --> 00:19:46,129 You must think me a fool! 318 00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:48,609 You have come here for no other reason 319 00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:50,689 but to steal the symbol of our great god. 320 00:19:50,769 --> 00:19:54,049 And what would I want with some earth-grubbing deity? 321 00:19:54,129 --> 00:19:56,129 I don't know. 322 00:19:56,209 --> 00:19:58,809 But before you die, 323 00:19:58,889 --> 00:20:01,569 I shall certainly find out. 324 00:20:05,569 --> 00:20:08,849 Where are you from, Old One? 325 00:20:08,929 --> 00:20:10,169 Old One? 326 00:20:10,249 --> 00:20:14,169 What station did you disgrace with your miserable presence, water thief? 327 00:20:14,249 --> 00:20:16,489 Look, I may look old to you, whiskerless youth, 328 00:20:16,569 --> 00:20:18,649 but I'll have you know I'm in the prime of my life. 329 00:20:18,729 --> 00:20:21,489 I'm only 900 years old. Now, untie me at once! 330 00:20:21,569 --> 00:20:24,129 You'll be untied as soon as we're ready for the stoning. 331 00:20:24,209 --> 00:20:27,209 Stoning? Is this the way you welcome visitors? 332 00:20:27,289 --> 00:20:28,929 Water is life. 333 00:20:29,009 --> 00:20:31,969 Those who steal life must in their turn die. 334 00:20:32,049 --> 00:20:34,489 The Immortal commands it. 335 00:20:34,569 --> 00:20:37,289 Oh, the Immortal? Who might that be? 336 00:20:38,089 --> 00:20:40,049 Come now, Old One. 337 00:20:40,129 --> 00:20:43,609 Feigning ignorance of the Immortal will not save you from death. 338 00:20:46,009 --> 00:20:48,529 This is what I've been waiting for. 339 00:20:50,889 --> 00:20:55,409 Now, Immortal, I am ready for you. 340 00:20:56,489 --> 00:20:58,169 Just who are you? 341 00:20:58,249 --> 00:21:01,009 I am Balazar, the reader of the books. 342 00:21:01,569 --> 00:21:03,769 Oh! And what books are those? 343 00:21:04,169 --> 00:21:06,889 Ancient books, from the world before the fire. 344 00:21:06,969 --> 00:21:10,249 They contain much wisdom for those who can interpret their meaning. 345 00:21:10,329 --> 00:21:13,009 Here in Marb, we have three. 346 00:21:13,089 --> 00:21:15,889 Three! Splendid! 347 00:21:15,969 --> 00:21:18,609 - What are they called? - The Books of Knowledge. 348 00:21:18,689 --> 00:21:21,289 No, but each book must have a name, Balazar. 349 00:21:21,369 --> 00:21:22,849 It's usually written on the front. 350 00:21:22,929 --> 00:21:26,849 One of our books is called Moby Dick by Herman Melville. 351 00:21:26,929 --> 00:21:30,809 It tells of a great, white water god and contains many mystical passages. 352 00:21:31,409 --> 00:21:33,449 Yes, I've read it. What are the other books? 353 00:21:33,529 --> 00:21:35,489 How can you have read it, Old One? 354 00:21:35,569 --> 00:21:39,329 - The sacred book belongs to Marb. - Will you stop calling me Old One? 355 00:21:39,409 --> 00:21:43,049 I am known as the Doctor. What else do you read? 356 00:21:43,129 --> 00:21:45,449 The Water Babies by Charles Kingsley, 357 00:21:45,529 --> 00:21:48,009 which tells of life long before the fire. 358 00:21:48,089 --> 00:21:51,169 Sounds a rum sort of library to me. What's your third book? 359 00:21:51,249 --> 00:21:54,649 Most mysterious of all the sacred texts, 360 00:21:54,729 --> 00:21:59,329 UK Habitats of the Canadian Goose by HM Stationery Office. 361 00:22:00,729 --> 00:22:02,249 Mmm. 362 00:22:02,329 --> 00:22:04,249 - What do you call this place? - Marb Station. 363 00:22:04,329 --> 00:22:06,729 No, I mean your whole world, everything. 364 00:22:06,809 --> 00:22:08,729 We call it UK Habitat. 365 00:22:16,009 --> 00:22:19,569 - They've got that woman we saw earlier. - I can't understand it, Dibber. 366 00:22:19,649 --> 00:22:22,209 - They're savages. - Well, don't let it get you down. 367 00:22:22,289 --> 00:22:26,289 What went wrong? That old hag took our guns away from us just like that. 368 00:22:26,369 --> 00:22:28,169 How can we be their prisoners? 369 00:22:28,249 --> 00:22:29,889 I told you it was risky coming here. 370 00:22:29,969 --> 00:22:32,369 Yes, well, now you know what I mean about competition. 371 00:22:32,449 --> 00:22:33,609 It gets you nowhere. 372 00:22:33,689 --> 00:22:35,585 I told you we should have blasted them, Mr Glitz. 373 00:22:35,609 --> 00:22:37,849 Yes, Dibber, you've made your point. 374 00:22:39,569 --> 00:22:41,889 I think it best that you stand over here. 375 00:22:41,969 --> 00:22:43,729 Oh, why? 376 00:22:43,809 --> 00:22:45,889 Well, in case some stray stone breaks the water jugs. 377 00:22:45,969 --> 00:22:47,369 Oh, yes. 378 00:22:47,449 --> 00:22:50,249 People get very excited at these stonings. 379 00:22:51,729 --> 00:22:53,329 I'm not excited. 380 00:22:54,169 --> 00:22:55,649 - Ready? - Yes. 381 00:22:57,009 --> 00:22:58,449 Get set. 382 00:22:58,529 --> 00:22:59,689 Go! 383 00:23:03,129 --> 00:23:05,089 (ALL CHEERING) 384 00:23:07,129 --> 00:23:10,969 Oh! Why did you stop it at the best bit? I was rather enjoying that. 385 00:23:11,049 --> 00:23:12,569 I'm sure you were. 386 00:23:12,649 --> 00:23:14,809 Clever, eh? That trick with the umbrella. 387 00:23:14,889 --> 00:23:16,609 Most ingenious, my dear Doctor. 388 00:23:16,689 --> 00:23:19,929 Oh, I always like to do the unexpected. Takes people by surprise. 389 00:23:20,009 --> 00:23:22,329 Hear how the Doctor takes pride in his interference. 390 00:23:22,409 --> 00:23:25,769 Hear how he boasts. This is not the reaction of a responsible Time Lord. 391 00:23:25,849 --> 00:23:28,369 We are all aware of that, Vale yard. 392 00:23:28,449 --> 00:23:30,769 What is the point you are trying to make? 393 00:23:30,849 --> 00:23:35,049 These proceedings started as a mere inquiry into the Doctor's activities. 394 00:23:35,129 --> 00:23:37,809 I'm suggesting now that it becomes a trial. 395 00:23:37,889 --> 00:23:39,409 And if he is found guilty, 396 00:23:39,489 --> 00:23:42,529 I strongly suggest the termination of his life.